FFTF Episode 1 - Failure as a Friend – Why Failure Isn’t Final
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[00:00:00] This is from failure to fulfillment, where every setback is simply a step towards the fulfillment of God's purpose in your life. Most of us see failure as the enemy, something to avoid at all costs. I used to think that too, but looking back, I realize failure has been one of my greatest teachers. In the mental health world, we know that reframing our experiences is powerful.
And scripture reminds us though the righteous fall seven times they rise again. Failure is not a stop sign. It's more like a friend nudging us forward. Today I want to explore why failure doesn't get the final word, and how befriending it can open the door to deeper fulfillment in Christ. Welcome to From Failure to Fulfillment, where failure isn't the end.
It's an [00:01:00] acronym for Growth, friend, analyze, investigate, learn, understand, regroup, and Execute. I'm your host, Dr. Andrew b Blackwood, also known as Coach Drew, and together we'll discover how God transforms our failures into steps towards Christ-like fulfillment. Have you ever failed? Fail to finish something you started.
I sure have and publicly at that and in this particular moment, it felt like the world was closing in. But now that I look back, I can see how that experience, that very failure taught me to search my motivations to understand how worry was leading me to hurry, and I'm grateful for how God used it to bring me closer to his purpose.
In today's episode, we'll unpack the lessons that failure offers. We're gonna explore how to lean into God's guidance when things go wrong [00:02:00] and reframe failure, not as a roadblock, but as a stepping stone toward growth and fulfillment. Writing my first book, the Art of a Genuine Apology in 2017. It was a significant accomplishment.
It was a dream that I held for a long time that was fulfilled and it has sold thousands of copies and has helped people around the world. But there's so much more to say, like the importance of understanding and entering into the process of forgiveness before offering a genuine apology. I've always wanted to write the prequel to the series, but I couldn't find the time.
Time was going by and social media influencers and life hacking gurus were sharing principles as if there were rules. And I, I, I, I bought into it. I fell for it. Hook, line and sinker ideas, like, just do it. Don't wait. Get out there. Build it [00:03:00] imperfectly. So I did. Unlike the 18 month journey of writing my first book, I decided to generate public interest and get people to sign up and join me on the journey of writing the second, but it never happened.
I was so embarrassed. Life happened, raising children happen, losses and transitions, and grief happened. Not keeping my word. Happened and it impacted me deeply because integrity is one of my core values. So failing to follow through, cut to the very core of my being. Looking back, failure was being a good friend, trying to, at least pulling me aside, saying, brother, you simply got too much going on.
Now analyzing the situation. I look back and I realize, yeah, I did have too much [00:04:00] on my plate to write another book, but why was I in such a hurry? Worry was leading me to hurry. I worried that someone else would come up with the same ideas I had, or maybe even better ideas, or express my ideas better than I could.
I thought I had to create momentum to stay current. But at the core of this was a desperation, a long held fear of poverty. Growing up in Jane and Finch, the second son of two hardworking Jamaican parents, and after the divorce, living in a single parent home, I experienced some scarcity, but it was nothing compared to the suffering of the world.
You know, people all around the world. But I carried a deeply held fear. We were always one step away from not having enough, not having enough food, not having enough clothes, and whatever it was, and my [00:05:00] father is loving and well intending as he is. He had this constant admonition still does to this day to get an education.
It's the only way out that instilled in me the idea that a good education would lead to a good life. And that good life meant financial security. Now I've since learned there's a difference between valuing money and needing it. Anything you need, you will live for, and anything you live for, you worship unknowingly.
Even as a kid, I was worshiping money, although my desire to help people through this book was genuine. It was sabotaged by fear. Desperation and a lack of safety, one of the three core human needs. I now teach people about safety, significance, and strength. Whether it was writing a book, launching a course, or creating a video series, anxiety [00:06:00] pushed me to act urgently robbing me of peace and joy.
Over time, I realized that the real issue isn't poverty. It's whether or not I trust God to take care of me. Peter's story comes to mind in Matthew chapter 14. In the middle of a storm, he courageously steps out in faith and walks on the water until the winds and the waves distract him. Fear takes over and he begins to sink.
He cries out to Jesus, who reaches out and saves him, but he asks the question, Peter, why did you doubt? Doubt and anxiety are often intertwined. Anxiety paints a negative picture of the future and fills us with fear, and I've discovered that my worry comes from imagining myself alone in my failure, as if it all depends on me instead of [00:07:00] trusting God and depending on him in every situation, whether in poverty or wealth, in sickness or in health, we can choose to depend on God.
Jesus himself modeled this as he approached the cross, though he prayed three times for the cup to pass. His resolve was nevertheless, let your will be done. That is trust. That is surrender, and that is something we all are called to grow into and grow through. Failure doesn't disqualify us. It redirects us.
It's an opportunity to trust God and anticipate his faithfulness in every season. So let me ask you, how has God used failure, even the fear that leads to failure in your life to shape you? I'd love to hear your thoughts today. We reframed failure as a friend. Romans 8 [00:08:00] 29 reminds us that God's purpose is to conform us to the image of his son.
Every stumble is part of that shaping. Failure isn't final. When God is forming us, it's an invitation to trust him more deeply. Where in your life can you welcome failure as a friend? A friend God uses to mature you into christlikeness. Thank you for spending the time with me. Until next time, keep moving.
From failure to fulfillment in Christ, let's close in prayer. Thank you, father, that with you, failure is never final. You have the power, but also the commitment and love to bring us to completion. We can be confident of this very thing that you have begun, a good work in us. You will bring it to completion until [00:09:00] the day of Christ Jesus.
Until Jesus Christ returns, until we look like him. When you, Christ is our life. When you return, we will be like you. So until then, we get to trust you and the work that you're doing in our lives and in our hearts, help us to remember that failure is never final when you are still forming us. In Jesus' name we pray.
Amen. May you go in the peace of Christ being renewed day by day and may every step, even the ones that feel like failure, draw you closer to the fulfillment of his purpose in your life.
